Jesus Came to My Door Today

Jesus came to my door today
Hot and sweaty, he'd walked a long way.
He asked for some water and I asked him in.
This is how my story begins.

He told me he had no place to stay
Though he'd asked at some places along the way
He didn't earn enough to foot the bill each day,
Much less have the money for the rent to pay.

Then he told me, though he was fit and able,
He'd worked really hard but had no food for his table.

He was on his way to work and couldn't stay
but I couldn't let him leave with no food for the way.
So I made arrangements, and we shared a meal,
I found transportation to seal the deal.

He was gracious and polite,
kind, sincere and relieved
He said, "Thank you."
and shook my hand as he started to leave.

He looked just like a friend, just an ordinary guy.
Hard on his luck though you could tell he tried.

My heart had been heavy and burdened with care,
But as soon as he left I knew Jesus had been here.
Now I was at peace, my fears set at bay,
Because Jesus came to my door today.

Cactus Flower

The story goes: My mother has created a visual representation of our family tree on a 10 foot piece of canvas. It is definitely an heirloom and a true legacy. Each family member has been designated a quilt pattern. My sister is sugar loaf because of her love of cooking. My dad is T-square because of his drafiting abilities. My mother is Crazy Ann because her name is Ann. My brother is Job's Trouble because well.... you get the picture. For me, she chose Cactus Flower!

Now my absolute first impression when she told me was one of hurt. It sounded so lonely and I didn't feel it really described me at all. I have always thought of myself as a happy person, who loves everyone and all of God's creation. I approach life with joy and wonder and just sheer determination. I love life!!! But a Cactus Flower????

When I expressed my surprise at her choice, her words to me were the most loving and affirming I could have ever wished for.
"A cactus blooms in the most adverse of circumstances. Life has been hard for you but you have still managed to blossom."

Wow! Such love and a real true understanding of who I really am. And so, I am so blessed that I am a cactus flower. So much so that I composed a song. Here are the lyrics.

Cactus Flower blooms in the desert
Never a word says she
Cactus Flower blooms in the desert
Tell me where do you get your energy?

From the Father of Lights beaming down
And the mighty stream that runs underground.

Rooted and grounded in His Love
She grows slowly, being fed from His hand.
Then out of the solitary
Her fruit can be seen by every man!

We are like the cactus flower
Growing in a solitary place.
We are like the cactus flower
The Glory that is seen upon our face,

Is from the Father of Lights beaming down
And the mighty stream that runs underground.

Cactus flowers
We bloom in the desert
For all the world to see!

Have a blessed day and remember to bloom where you are planted!

Musings

Well, it has been a while since I came here. I think it is important for me to begin visiting here more often. There is so much going on in my life and my spirit. I need to document and solidify my musings, so that I can make good decisions.

My first thoughts this morning were triggered by the occurences of last night/early morning. Hubby and I have started reading Simplicity by John Michael Talbot with Dan O'Neill. The first chapter is on Humility and what that means in the body of Christ AND how it is walked out in our lives. The questions at the end of the chapter are thought provoking and challenge one to change their M. O. I thought I had it figured out what 'non-humble' task the Lord had called me to work on for the next two weeks. Boy was I wrong!

One of the scriptures discussed in the book is of course from St. Paul's writings admonishing us to not think more highly of ourselves than we ought and to esteem others over ourselves, recognizing that each person is created in the image and likeness of God. Therefore as we relate to each other in this world we are to honor the Lord and His likeness in other people. Basically this is the theme of the Ragamuffin Gospel.

Interesting how prideful I am. I thought I do that! No problem....hmmmmm. But what is my reaction to things that annoy or irritate me??? Do I let those things slide off my back or do I take them to heart and begin to make a talley count, keeping a record of wrongs??? Wrongs to whom??? Who am I to be "wronged?"

Ah... and so the Lord allowed a situation to occur in my life to show me just how prideful and loftily I rank myself. Instead of being gracious and making the best of the situation, I began to ruminate over the circumstances and taking in the bitterness that was beginning to churn in my heart. O wretched sinner that I am. I, of course, have had a morning of meditating on this and now realize that confession is necessary. Acknowledging my sin and my utter weakness when it comes to pride. May the Merciful God forgive me and lead me to life everlasting.

Dove-tailing to this revelation is part of the sermon from this morning's mass by Father Mitch Pacwa. The very last little bit of his homily was on the "yoke" of Jesus. Jesus was a carpenter by trade and yokes were not "one size fits all" but tailor made to the team of oxen. Jesus says,
"Come to me all you who labor and are overburdened, and I will give you rest. Shoulder my yoke and learn from me for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. Yes, my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matt. 11:28-30

The yoke He has constructed is tailor made to HIM!!!! He is the lead ox. Yet He humbled HIMSELF and became a man, and so He also tailor makes the yoke we must use as well to fit US!!! So that when He and I pull together, He being the Lead, carries the weight of the yoke. The key is for me to not fight against the yoke, but HUMBLE MYSELF and put on HIS yoke. Only in this way, will I be satified and make spiritual progress.

And so, these musings today give me some food for thought and meditation. Lord Help me to remember that you are part of everyone I meet and I should esteem them better than myself because YOU ARE GREATER!

Shalom

Today I am not feeling well. I have not been really feeling well all month. The only thing I can think about this is that God is calling for me to BE STILL as usual. I have moments when I try to 'figure it all out.' That is when I start wandering further and further from the Lord. When I relax and lean into HIM...something wonderful happens. Peace. I don't feel like I have to carry the weight of my life on my own shoulders. Question is: "Why do I keep trying to do it all myself?

If only, I could just learn to lean into the Lord EVERY day. I would be a much happier human being.

Thank you Lord, for letting me lean into you. You shelter me in the shadow of your wings and I am at peace.

Shalom...

I am so glad God is not a man. Though He became a man, Yahshua, He is NOT subject to this flesh anymore.

I am so tossed and turned by every wind that comes along. I thought I was more stable than this. I guess I was fooling myself.

I make a decision and then, one word of rebuff, or discouragement and I am off course or stalled. Why is that? What is it that keeps me from maintaining my momentum?

I get started and my confidence is high, and I start to share where I am headed and at some points I am met with encouragement and "atta boys." At the very next wave..."wham!" I am hit with a breaker of negativity that knocks the wind out of my sails! I have to change tack until I find the Wind again and in the meantime I am scrambling to keep my balance and not capsize!

Oh! Ruach haKodesh, Holy Spirit...Breath of God...breathe into my sail and keep me on course, else my little skiff capsize or run aground with hopelessness and despair.

When all else fails...

i have learned a valuable lesson today from the Lord. He is the ONE who can make things happen or not. He is the ONE who can do it all. i have no strength in myself. The only recourse i have is to look to HIM and TRUST that He has it all under control.

i have been up since 1:30 this morning, yet hinei lo yanum ve lo ishan, shomer Yisrael...He that keepeth Israel neither slumbers nor sleeps.

i have been trying to make decisions based on logic. Not smart when His ways are Higher than mine. ... i, i, i,....yes, I used a lower case i on purpose. For that is what it is... a lower case to His, I AM.

And so when all else fails, i will look to the hills from whence cometh my help! i will look to the great YaHuWeH...I AM.

Daddy....

My daddy turns 80 in just a few days from now. Oh how I love my daddy! Yes, I am 54 years old and I still call him daddy!

To me, he is the greatest daddy in the world. He loves me. He hasn't always said the words, but I have known for all my life that he loves me. He loves all of his children. I know it. How? He worries, gets angry, cries for them, and silently wishes they would call or come by...or just send and email or card. Yep...that's my daddy.

He is such a smart man and can he write or what? He has recently started writing his memoirs. I love it when he sends me a copy of them. I have learned more about my daddy in the last few years than I have known my whole life.

Why, wonder of wonders, he was a kid! Yeah! Can you believe it? A real kid with adventures and stories....my, my! I never thought of my daddy as a kid. Oh, I knew he was one once but I have only ever known him as my daddy. Strong, quiet, firm, gentle... He still is, but now I understand him just a little better. And I appreciate him a whole lot more.

I can't believe he is going to be 80 years old soon. I hope there are 80 more to come. I really like having him around.

Happy Birthday Daddy!