Thursday, October 30, 2008
who fulfill His commands, attentive to the SOUND of His Words!
I have been reminded lately of the Power in the Word of God. To be able to add my voice to the written word brings great power and peace to my heart. And according to the above scripture it is what causes the angels of God to move to accomplish HIS will, HIS Word!
I used to be very faithful about praying the Word, but have slacked off and lost the fervor of heart that I used to have. Thankfully, God has brought to me a group of women who love HIM and HIS Word. Their love and encouragement has brought a newfound zeal for the Word. I am so grateful that these precious women have given my soul the encouragement I needed to stand up, and stand firm in my beliefs.
And so I believe, they are some of the angels among us.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
I have told God not to make me any more promises before. I am getting older and there are so many things that I would have liked to have seen or done in my life. And I have to admit, sometimes I get angry at God and wonder why I have these hopes and dreams if He is not going to fulfill them.
One of those dreams has always been to be a mom. I love children so much and I want so much to have children of my own.
God gave me that opportunity many years ago, but because of life's circumstances and my own fears I aborted that blessing. It was my decision ultimately but one made out of duress. If I could take it back, knowing what I know now, I would in a heartbeat. So now my child is in my Heavenly Father's care. Jordan Keeley is her name and I love her with all my heart.
Then I tried to make the dream come true by adopting 3 children, all full siblings, very close in age. After 2 years of love and care and psychiatrists, and doctors, and therapists, I was spent. I became physically and emotionally ill. And the final outcome was to reliquish them back to the custody of the state. This is another story that needs to be told soon, but suffice it to say trying to make things happen is not a good thing.
Just one dream of mine that I feel like I cannot risk hoping for anymore.
Lately, I was talking to the Lord about this particular dream and He told me something very precious. Every child, whose life I have touched, has been my child. I am a spiritual mother to myriads of children! What a blessing!
I am a teacher, tutor, catechist, friend, aunt...and all those children are mine spiritually. What a joy! How much better is that than just having one or two biological children? Not that I wouldn't still love to have a biological child but ... I have more children now than I could ever physically have!
So He answered that dream in a way that I wasn't expecting but that is really more fulfilling. What a GREAT Father I have! He thinks in so much broader terms than I do with my finite mind. So hope? Yes, I still hope. Think I have been forgotten or forsaken? Only when I don't see what my Abba sees.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Imagine you have just been informed that you have inherited a multi-level mansion equipped with every conceivable treasure. You run up the curving brick sidewalk, throw open the massive oak doors, and excitedly run from room to room hardly believing the good fortune bequeathed to you! However, what you discover are not the surroundings fit for a queen that you expected, but sensible chambers, adequately furnished and sparsely decorated.
In the foyer, a beautifully carved winding staircase, adorned with plush crimson carpet, beckons you to climb to the next level. You consider the steps, look back over your shoulder and decide, "Hey, the lower level's enough for me. Besides, I'm afraid of heights. I'll just stay down here where it's safe."
Unbeknownst to you, the upper levels house all the treasures intended to become your inheritance, and you're standing in the servants' quarters. Upstairs awaits a golden gilded ballroom, a chandeliered dining hall, four poster beds with down filled mattresses, a safe filled with enough gold and silver to last a lifetime, and a jewelry box brimming with family heirlooms.
All that stands between you and these treasures is the staircase. What keeps you on ground level - contentment with mediocrity, lack of knowledge, or a fear of the unknown?
I love the story but I don't think I fit into any of the questions as to why I would choose to stay at ground level. My first thought was contentment. But as I continued to read the other choices I didn't fit and was mildly offended by them. I guess there are people who would not go up the stairs because of fear, or simple ignorance. BUT what about simply humility and a lack of greed? What about being satisfied with the good bestowed?
Maybe I am fooling myself. I really didn't identify with a ballroom, four poster beds. The silver and gold ... that would be nice.
Personally, I would not like to live lavishly, but comfortably. And what's so bad about the servants quarters? After all, they are "sensible chambers, adequately furnished and sparsely decorated." Yeshua did not live outrageously but LARGE. There is a difference.
I think that this "wanting more'' mindset is worldly. We are to accept what God has for us and expect Him to give us what we NEED. And often enough, He gives us what we want because of His great love for us. We can ask for our wants even as little children, but we can count on our needs being met according to His riches in Glory.
And what would be His riches in Glory? Not gold or silver, chandeliered ballrooms, and four poster beds, but love, joy, peace, gentleness, goodness, kindness, faith, self-control, mercy, forgiveness, and eternal life!
So, my outrageous requests would be:
1. more real abiding peace in my soul
2. more of Him and less of me
3. those comfortable, adequate servant's quarters because that is what I am. While I am on this earth, I am His servant-daughter. When I stand before Him in Glory then...I will have all the riches of heaven.
I mean really! If I got everything I wanted here, what would I have to look forward to in Heaven?
Monday, October 20, 2008
Friday, October 17, 2008
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Not sure I can do this but I am going to try. I have to stipulate, these are in no particular order.
- Tea set given to me by my grandmother when I was 5 years old
- Earrings and pendant given to me by my mother
- My wedding ring
- The Life Book given to me and made by my mom
- My wedding video and album
Now, if all those things were lost, stolen, burned, or destroyed in some way, how would that effect me in light of eternity? It wouldn't.
Oh, don't get me wrong I would be devastated and grieve immensely but I would be so grateful that my loved ones were okay.
There is nothing so important in this life that I would want to lose my eternal life with Yeshua.
This was good for my soul. How did you fare?
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Deep breaths. Slowly moving thoughts weaving in and out of my mind and heart. A quiet conversation with my maker about the upcoming events of the day.
Asking, seeking, for the important things. Trying to prioritize. Looking for serenity and wisdom for the day.
Oh, how I love this time alone with HIM. Sometimes I sing. Sometimes I voice my prayers. But most of the time I just sit and listen to the quiet and feel His love and comfort.
Time a precious gift spent with the King of Kings, my Abba!